My freshmen year at Benedictine College, one of my closest friends delighted us all with news that he was headed for the seminary. A young man with strong devotions to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and the Blessed Mother, Chris’s talents were in making people laugh and making people pray. His convictions were contagious and many of our friends grew as Catholics in his friendship; the fact that he discerned a vocation to the priesthood seemed perfect, and while we would miss him, we were excited. His parents, however, were less than thrilled. Chris is an only child, so with his entrance into the priesthood and its vow of celibacy, his parents would never have a daughter-in-law, grandchildren or fulfilled fantasies of big family Christmases. The idea of their only son being a busy diocesan priest was, understandably, a hard pill to swallow.
The reaction is all too common. Thinking of one’s grown up child entering the religious life as a priest, sister or brother can be generally foreign or perhaps peculiar. Even my dad, wonderful as he was, raised an eyebrow when I mentioned discerning life as a cloistered nun. And I get it; it seems contrary to the classic American ambition of “making something of yourself,” of going out and making the world your oyster. Young parents beam at their toddlers with wonder – will she be a doctor? Will he study law like his father? How many people look at their little ones with big, bright hopes of them taking a veil or collar?
I’d like to argue, though, that encouraging your children to think about what real life would be like as a monk, nun, or priest is the most hopeful thing you can do for the Church. Even if they consider it and don’t feel called to the religious life, entertaining the idea requires a bit of investigating and a lot of prayer, both as an individual and family, which will only better their souls. In a diocese that is still comparatively new, in a region with a small handful of religious and a shortage of priests like many others in the U.S., it’s difficult to see the impact and happiness a person experiences when fully consecrated to God. And neither is it well known that each religious order has a charism – a specific work or mission performed by the community as a whole to further the Kingdom of God and draw everyone closer to Christ. For example, the ever joyful Dominican sisters are committed to excellence in education; Benedictines are dedicated to prayerful work for the Church and Franciscans work for the spiritual and physical provision of the poor.
Every vocation, whether married or religious, invites a person to love and sacrifice in a particular way; and as Bishop Duca observed at Deacon Keith Garvin’s recent ordination, “Sacrificial love often allows us to become the best version of ourselves.” Entrance into a religious order is not a loss of life, it’s an enhancement of it. It’s a heroic adventure of the soul to accept the challenges God offers, to trust, and to commit entirely to his service. So ask your children, invite a priest or religious to dinner, go to an ordination Mass, and make daily prayer part of your family life. Above all, pray for your children’s joyful acceptance of God’s will and for the grace to encourage them.
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This was originally published in the Diocese of Shreveport’s Catholic Connection.
