Andrew and I are in the middle of a rousing game of Don’t $pend a Penny. He got a raise a couple of months ago and since then we’ve been on a [minor] spree, giddy with false financial freedom – false because A) the raise doesn’t actually take effect until August and B) we have other real and serious financial priorities.
The decision to “play” was a mutual concession. It hit us that, though we weren’t being reckless with our funds, we weren’t being careful with them either and we needed to take a time-out to evaluate our situation and settle into a more solid financial plan. So what do we do? Compete! Who can go longer without buying anything? While it seems self-explanatory from the name of the game, there are a few rules, or principles rather, to keep us in line.
1.) Self-Control: We don’t usually blow our cash on bigger purchases like new entertainment speakers or designer purses; instead our money tends to trickle out in the forms of coffee and frozen yogurt. They’re small pick-me-ups – so accessible and convenient that we’ve become quite comfortable with the view from the “drive-thru.” The cost, too, feels inconsequential at just a dollar or two per occasion and when we have a coupon it feels like it’s practically free! Aside from that, my own weakness is the Fossil Outlet in town. So cute and so affordable that with a sale on top of the outlet prices, I’d be crazy not to buy, right?
I didn’t realize how much we were inclined to treat ourselves until we were scooting about town running errands and the temptation came up. Needless to say, this habit is kicked cold-turkey. We can do coffee and other fun snacks at home or, for the time, FREE coffee at Wendy’s; and I broke up with Fossil too. Cute, but unnecessary, and hardly a priority considering that we have children and a house. Any other unnecessary purchases are delayed until the game is suspended and we’ve budgeted them in. Which brings me to the next principle…
2.) Ultimate Survival: Without the convenience of buying what’s convenient, you learn the fundamental concept of surviving with what you have and nothing else. During Don’t $pend a Penny I try to avoid even the grocery store and the gas station for as long as I can. The gas station is easier than you might think. Because I’m not driving around spending money, I use less fuel. Less fuel = fewer trips to Circle K = keeping money in the bank for longer. I postpone grocery trips until we’re slightly desperate and out of stock on essentials like milk and eggs. Do you know how much you can save by actually using what you have? I did a whole week and a half of meal planning by restricting myself to our current pantry and freezer. A few days later, my trip to the store was delightfully brief because I grabbed only the needed basics, maintaining fidelity to my creative menu.
In the game, we recognize the difference between what we need and want and then follow through with the former. I’d love a new pair of boat shoes since mine are a little rough-looking and leaky these days, but can I get by with what I have? Certainly, so I’ll delay that purchase for a while and budget it in when the opportunity comes.
3.) Honesty: I’m truly happy to say that I returned the merchandise I bought during the aforementioned spree. Well, most of it. You can’t return frozen yogurt. But I had to return them because I found myself in a state of unrest with my purchases. When you get something new, it’s exciting and fun, but with this stuff, I was robbed of the thrill knowing that I was spending money we didn’t have. I thought, Do I really need this or even want it? When I’m honest with myself, I know that I’ll feel safer and more secure returning that which is excessive and then resisting impulsive frivolousness. By the way, returning un-used merchandise for a refund or store credit is a great way to put wasted money back in your pocket.
And finally, hands down, one of the most important rules of the game is: 4.) Know when to quit 🙂 Don’t $pend a Penny is a great game because it forces us to be creatively stingy and overall pretty miserly for the sake of stepping back from immoderate spending. The idea of playing keeps things light and more fun instead of oppressive and limiting. We want to spread our cash across more blocks on the calendar and the way to do that is to keep it instead of spend it. That’s the objective within the game. The overall point, however, is to re-teach ourselves prudence and while we joke about it being a competition, it’s always a team effort complete with communication, prayer, and mutual obedience. We don’t always play Don’t $pend a Penny because it’s so restrictive and because a knee-jerk reaction to the other extreme of a behavior (too much spending versus no spending at all) is often as bad as the initial vice itself. All things in moderation, after all!
The humbling truth is that the money we have isn’t ours – it’s God’s gift entrusted to us and we are the stewards. In trimming the fat from our expenditures, we re-learn the discipline of budgeting, of denying ourselves unnecessary and pointless purchases, and ultimately temperance.
Katie Martinez says
What a great idea! I’m so bad with those occasional small purchases, coffee, ice cream, etc, and Mark and I are so competitive… Plus I always get slightly offended when he suggests we should tone it back on spending, so this would make it more fun 🙂
Katie says
I know what you mean, Katie!! Whenever Andrew suggests that we cut back, I’m embarrassed b/c if HE’S noticed our over-spending, then it must be bad since I’M the one who keeps our budget. It’s always a little humbling revealing our true financial status to him – but he has to be in the loop to help keep both of us accountable!
Rhonda @ A Naptime Novelist says
We’ve done this! We’ve also played, “Let’s empty the pantry!” Loads of fun.
Katie says
We’ll have to play that one, too! Thanks for your comment – I love your blog and the whole idea behind it 🙂 Naptime is so sweetly silent, don’t you agree? 🙂 God bless!
Rhonda @ A Naptime Novelist says
No, thank *you*! 🙂 Glad you stopped by.
Michael says
I started playing your game many years ago and haven’t looked back. I drive a nine year old car and have no car payment. I never refinanced my house and thus still have a mortgage payment lower than what I was paying for rent even 16 years ago (and that’s even with only putting down 3% when I bought). I gave up cable TV a couple years ago and don’t have that expense. I’ve changed my vacation habits from flying somewhere, staying in hotels and spending lots of money to driving somewhere, camping out or staying with friends or in low cost motels — and having better, more fulfilling vacations because of it.
There are so many ways to play your game all the time and still make life be so wonderfully fulfilling.
Katie says
I couldn’t agree more! We’ve cut cable, too and have one cell phone between us and one car as well. The simpler life is much better and it encourages closer relationships in our family. Thank you so much for your insight!
unwobblingpivot says
This is great stuff! I did something similar last November (and lost 8 lbs in the process, which allowed me to get off of expensive anti-reflux meds I’d been on for yrs — what a bonus!). One additional benefit is that it puts you in solidarity with the poor. There’s nothing like imposing upon yourself by choice what others must experience without choice and really seeing the world from their eyes. This is true poverty of spirit. You begin to see the truth: the kingdom of heaven comes in like the tide instead you sensing you must pursue it. Also, if you haven’t read it, Fr. Thomas Dubay’s Happy are You Poor is one of the most challenging yet most rewarding reads ever.
Katie says
I feel so humbled to say that I didn’t even think of solidarity with the poor. Thank you for your contribution. I will say that more and more lately I’ve been realizing the insignificance of material possessions and feel almost a conflict with owning very much. One of my favorite hobbies is home decor, but at the end of life, does it really matter? What are your thoughts on this?
unwobblingpivot says
I believe it’s good to surround oneself with beauty. If one is trying to reflect the source of all beauty, God, and trying to indirectly bring Him to mind, rather than trying to keep up with the Joneses, I’m all for it! Example: my local cathedral without the beautiful ‘decor’ would be less supportive of promoting the awe that one should bring to the act of worship.
Sarah says
I am a big one for shopping at thrift stores. Can you redecorate for nothing? Can you change the look of a room for $25? Maybe you can re-discover some extra stuff you weren’t using, or recombine your items in a new way that makes it fresh?
I just re-decorated my refrigerator by removing EVERYTHING and then allowing each family member to include only a few items. What a difference!